[CLOSED] taking on water.

[deacon reid rudman]

"You have me.. and Bandit.. But most of all, you have Christy, Connor.. She needs you now more than ever. She doesn't know when your last day is going to be.. You need to live for her, prove to her that love and happiness does exist.. Show her she doesn't have to be a princess to have a fairytale ending.. She needs to know you love her. Live for her if you can't find anything else to live for.." He said quietly, rubbing his back slowly. "But above all, you need to live for you.. Make yourself a better person.. Prove to your father that yeah, he set you back, but you're gonna keep going, that you're gonna keep living.."

[connor crayze sykes]

Tears rolled silently down Connor's cheeks and he kept his face hidden, afraid to let Deacon see. "O-okay..." He whispered, voice cracking. He sniffed, rubbing angrily at his face. He bit his lip, hand gripping Deacon's arm gently.

[deacon reid rudman]

Deacon tipped his chin back, kissing him softly. He held him close, not wanting to let him go. He ran his thumb across his cheek, then kissed him again.

"You will never.. be forgotten, Connor.." He said, choking back tears. "Not by me. Not by Christy. You will always be the first thing I think about in the morning, and the last thing I think about at night.. And no one will ever take that place.. No one will be able to replace you.."

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor choked softly. "Y-you can't make promises like that Deacon...y-y-you have forever..y-you'll fall in love again a-and I'll just be a-another memory in the dark..." He coughed, kissing him tenderly, lips moist with his tears. "I-I hate admitting it but i-it's true...." He shuddered faintly.

Golden eyes closed in an attemot to stop the flow of tears but it didn't matter anymore, he'd cracked and everything was being let out.

[deacon reid rudman]

"You may think I will, but I wont.. I may live forever, but I only get one chance at love, just like everyone else. And my chance is sitting right here.." He said softly, hugging him close. He hated to see him cry, but he would rather see him cry than know he was bottling it all in.

"I don't want to love anyone other than you, Connor.. And I never will. That's a promise I'm going to make, and a promise I'm going to keep. Whether you believe it or not." He rubbed his back gently, wishing he could make him feel better.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor buried his face against Deacon's bare chest to try and muffle with hiccups and broken sobs. "I-I don't wanna leave you," He rasped, swallowing. "I-I don't wanna h-hurt nomore..."

He felt horrible for making Deacon deal with all of this, make him see him in this state, how exactly big a mess he was. "I'm s-s-sorry..." He whispered, words wavering as he coughed.

[deacon reid rudman]

"I don't want you to leave either, Connor.." He whispered, stroking his hair. "We're gonna work on it, okay? I'll make a bunch of calls tonight and see when the soonest is we can get you into surgery, okay? That way you won't hurt anymore."

He heard him apologize and shook his head. "Don't ever say you're sorry for being hurt, Connor. I'd rather hold you when you cry, than watch you suffer and not want to touch me at all." He tipped his chin back, kissing him softly.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor met the kiss, his lip and jaw trembling, and he swallowed. "O-okay..." He breathed, drawing in a long, wavering breath, trying to recollect himself, tell himself everything would be alright. He refused to let Deacon know that actually stepping foot into a hospital would be a problem.

He curled up against him, eyes closing, breaths gradually slowing down from their original broken hiccups. He kissed him again, a hand finding the back of Deacon's neck as he searched his eyes.

[deacon reid rudman]

Deacon looked down at him, running a thumb across his bottom lip. He gazed down at him, biting his own lip. He ran a hand though his hair, watching him intently, like a child watching something behind glass, something it wants so bad, but it can't touch.

"If this isn't love.. I don't know what is.." He said softly, running his fingers gently down Connor's cheek. He smiled a soft smile, then leaned down, kissing him gently. "It's gonna rain soon. Why don't we go in?"

[connor crayze sykes]

"I dunno.." He murmured, gazing gently back. He glanced at the sky at Deacon's words, nodding, and sat up with reluctance, bit back a pained breath at the brief jolt in his abdomen before it again faded back to that dull ache.

"I-I guess that means I need to g-go get evaluated.." He murmured, swallowing. Dreading what he would be told, how much worse things had got.