[CLOSED] you're giving me such a rush.

[britton "britt" markus roberts]

"Yeah, but Monroe usually works evening classes. He didn't drop Jack off until like, noon or whatever today." He said, pressing his hand to hers. But his hands compared to any other male's would make his seem like a woman's hands. The only actual hard labor he had done was being a tour manager.

"Jack's really not hard to watch. He likes to color and draw and impress the ladies. So he's pretty much his dad in a nutshell." He smiled, rubbing one of his fingers against hers. "I wanna be a family with you one day.. Have a house and a baby running around.. I can't have my own but.." He shrugged.

[zoey ashlyn martyn]

Zoey smiled. "He seems like a good kid." She laced their fingers together, continuing to play with his hand. "I would like that.. There's always adoption when I'm old enough and ready.." She was terrified, thinking ahead. Commitment was something she wanted, but for him was it a wish or a promise? She couldn't get her hopes up by looking into the future, not when she was still just in high school. She smiled again, leaning up for another kiss. "You would be a great father..."
She bit her lip, missed her own. MIA still, and she knew she should give up hope that he would ever be back. It had been too long, the military had yet to find his body.

[britton "britt" markus roberts]

He kissed her back gently, squeezing her hand. "I guess all that can wait until you're done with high school and college and you have a job. Then you can worry about all that.." He forced a smile, squeezing her hand again.

'You know you aren't going to be with her forever. Forever doesn't exist.' That voice mocked, and he honestly didn't doubt it. He had never been one to believe in happily ever after. Not after Mat combusted on stage years ago. "I'm happy just coming to the park and playing with kids." He said quietly.

[zoey ashlyn martyn]

Zoey nodded, holding his hand tightly. She watched him quietly for a moment, rested her head against him as she spoke again. "I know you are, Britt.." Another soft kiss, tracing her hand slowly across his stomach.

'You really think you love him. Fool.'

She shifted her weight, trying to ignoring him in her head. She was happy right now, he didn't need to be ruining it.

[britton "britt" markus roberts]

Britt kissed her gently, his hands pressed to the small of her back to keep her close. He slowly traced his tongue over her bottom lip before he pulled away, chewing on his lip.

"You just.. can't grow up fast enough.. And I know this is Satan's way of being a dick and saying 'oh, well, every other guy has fucked her and you can't' because he loves to fucking- forget it." He dropped the subject, looking out at the swings and slides and climbing walls. 'Youll never know what it's like to bring your kid here..'

[zoey ashlyn martyn]

Zoey bit her lip guiltily as she listened. "I didn't want to sleep with all those guys, Britt..." She gazed up at him brokenly. "I would sleep with you in a heartbeat a-..and not because I'm some slut..." She kissed him gently. "You're the only guy I can even trust besides Tony. And he doesn't count because he acts like a girl." She touched his cheek gently. "I've already grown up too fast, don't let him get to you..."

[britton "britt" markus roberts]

"No, I'm selfish. He's been torturing me all fucking day, he's been showing me things I don't wanna see and telling me things I don't wanna hear and.. Just don't grow up, Zoey.. It's really not worth it.." He mumbled, sitting her on the grass beside him. "If you have to be a child forever, do it. Because growing up blows. If I had a choice, I'd still be on a tour bus with two crazy queers and an insane band. I wouldn't be putting fucking ink on people. Not professionally. Don't worry about growing up and having a family and a husband and all that because every bit of that white picket fence shit is bull. And you'd be a fool to believe it." He folded his hands in his lap, leaning back against the tree.

'Whats wrong? You don't want her now?' That voice taunted.

'No. I don't. You made me so sick of her and seeing her naked I don't want to fucking see her again.. You're a fucking bastard.'

'Ill show you sick.'

"Oh what's the worst you can possibly fucking do?! Kill me? Do it. I don't give a single fuck." He muttered. "I'm ready for hell, you fucking ass."

[zoey ashlyn martyn]

Zoey's jaw trembled as she watched him, reached out to take his hand. "Calm down, Britton.." She murmured. "You can't help that that stage blew up, Britt.. That everything changed..." She played with his fingers, gentle tears falling down he cheeks as she listened to him mutter. "Don't beg to leave...please Britt....I-..." She swallowed, rested her head against his shoulder. "I know he'll always make my life hell okay...? I know that, I made a mistake selling my soul... Don't tell him to take you..." She buried her face against him. "I'm sorry I said anything..."

[britton "britt" markus roberts]

"I've begged for him to take me before and he never did. He says he doesn't obey orders. Well I don't obey fucking orders either." He muttered, wrapping an arm loosely around her. He didn't know if he was more disgusted at the things she had done that he had seen, or with Satan for showing him.

"I could have fixed the wires. If I would have fixed the wires, Mat would have been fine.. Dylan would be fine. We would probably be famous and touring and having fun. All Dylan wanted to do was propose to him. That's it. And now Mat's gonna die any day. There's a lot of things you can't help, Zoey. But fixing wires is one of the things you can.."

[zoey ashlyn martyn]

"You didn't know, Britton.." She whispered softly, wiping at her tears. She continued playing with his hand. "I'm sorry.." She cried softly. "He made me sleep around, made me want it..and every time I could only scream in my own head... I-" Her jaw trembled, and she tried climbing back into his laugh. "I dunno what he showed you, what he told you Britt... But I-...I love you..."