[CLOSED] broken and bruised; longing for you.

[deacon reid rudman]

"Yeah, hims do." She said. She kissed him, then toddled back up the stairs, and climbed sleepily into her bed. She reached for her teddy bear, hugging it close.

Deacon sighed, sitting back on his feet. "Nashville died and he wasn't supposed to, so me and Devan had to go up to heaven and see what they could do and Adam started asking about you.. So I brought him down to see you.. You can't see him, but if you go upstairs, maybe you can catch him before he has to go back." He chewed on his lip ring guiltily. "I'm not supposed to bring him back, though. So this is all you got. I'll get you and Bandit taken away if I keep doing it."

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor watched her go.

"All I got i-is nothing, Deacon.. Nothing but you and Bandit a-anymore..." He bit his lip, gazing up at him.

Adam tucked her in. "Goodnight, girly. Take good care of him now, huh?" He kissed her forehead, hugging her tight before leaving the room and heading downstairs, watching them. He hesitated, stooped and hugged Connor, felt his brother draw in a breath at whatever feeling it left him with. "I love you, little brother... So much, you don't even know.." He swallowed, kissed the side of his head. The moment he did, Connor closed his eyes, a single tear rolling down his cheek. "I'm so s-sorry, Adam.. I love you so much.."

The blonde teen gently let go, whispering thanks to Deacon and watching him brokenly. He managed a faint smile and headed for the door. It opened and closed, Connor drawing in a quiet breath, a shiver crossing his features. He felt beyond empty suddenly, had been so clueless.. And yet, he couldn't separate his grief and happiness, just hugged Deacon tight.

[deacon reid rudman]

Bandit looked up at him, watching him go before she closed her eyes, quickly falling asleep.

Deacon looked up at him, almost wishing he could give Connor the chance to actually hug his brother and see him again. Everything seemed so one sided now, only one of them able to see the other. He wrapped his arms tightly around Connor, hugging him close. "He loves you, Connor.. It's obvious he wants you to be happy.. And I'm so sorry I can't bring him back to you.." He whispered, hugging him close. He felt like he had broken Connor, that he had done wrong even if he was just trying to make one of them happy.

[connor crayze sykes]

"I know h-he does.." He whispered softly, swallowing. "You don't have to be s-sorry.. If I hadn't gone to play f,fucking Russian Roulette, h-he wouldn't be dead..." His jaw trembled. "Worst way to c,,celebrate your brother's birthday, h-huh? Holding his dead body u-under that damned bridge?" He gagged softly, shifting his weight, and drew in a slow breath.

[deacon reid rudman]

"It's okay, Connor.." He said quietly, slowly stroking his hair. He held him close, gently kissing his neck. He gently picked him up, carrying him upstairs. He laid him down in the bed, then climbed in beside him, gently stroking his hair. 'Wow, you really are a fuck up.' Death said, but Deacon didn't argue. If he hadn't offered to bring Adam down, he wouldn't be in this prediciment. He slowly ran his fingers through Connor's hair, biting his lip. "Bandit can come sleep with us if you want.."

[connor crayze sykes]

"No i-it's not... It'll never be ok-kay in that aspect, Deacon.." He bit his lip, hugging him tight. "H-he should have been my best man a-at the wedding, you know?" He shook his head as Deacon offered to bring Bandit in, rolled onto his side and kissed him softly. "It's been n-nearly two years.. Maybe I sh-should just get over it.."

[deacon reid rudman]

"And you should have been alive, well, and marrying a woman when your wedding day came too.. You shouldn't be marrying the grim reaper who's like.. three times your age. And you shouldn't have a little red head running around calling you daddy. But things never happen the way we want them to." He said, gently running his fingers through his hair. He met the kiss gently, wrapping his arms tightly around him. "I don't expect you to get over it, Connor. I want you to remember your brother and smile at the memories and cry 'cause you miss him. Because it means you're only human."

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor bit his lip. "I know.." He whispered. "Thank y-you... For letting him see m-me.." He knew as well as Deacon that he would never see his brother after this next death, never have that chance. It was straight to hell for him.. Even if he was already living it.

He stroked Deacon's cheek, blew hair from his face. "I n-need a haircut.." The faintest of smiles shadowed the sorrow in his tired eyes.

[deacon reid rudman]

"You're welcome.." He said quietly, gently running his fingers over Connor's back. He watched him carefully, afraid he would do something he might regret later. Normally, he would just trust Connor. But since he got sick, he didn't trust anything. Connor could flip in a second and Deacon didn't want to go through that again. He wanted things to be okay like they are now.

"I like your hair. But mine never gets any longer, so maybe I'm just jealous." He teased, kissing his nose playfully. He reached up, brushing his hair out of his face.

"Daddy.." Deacon looked over to see Bandit standing in the door, her blanket trailing behind her and her doll tight in her arm. "Daddy, I come sleep with you?"

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor bit his lip, but allowed his next smile to show through. He shifted his weight some, his wariness and unease fading gradually as the days passed, the medicine forcing the parasite to go dormant again. But he knew it wasn't gone, could resurface any time.

He looked up as Bandit spoke. "Come h-here, baby.."