[CLOSED] nothing but broke promises.

[deacon reid rudman]

Deacon looked down at him, but didn't bother to get out of the tree. He didn't see the point. There was no reason for him to get down until Connor finally went back inside. Then again, it might be best if he was somewhere else when his memory was wiped clean, along with the memory anyone had of Connor.

"If you can't do it, then leave.. You're going to be a whole new person by night fall anyways. So why bother?" He could have been much worse, if Connor were actually trying to kill himself. But Deacon had no reason to scream at him, or torment him. He wanted to tell him that he loved him, that he wanted him to stay, that no one could ever mean near as much to him. He wanted to kiss him and hold him close, and show him that everything really was going to be okay. But Deacon was just a shell inside of Death's head, screamed pleas to be let out.

'Connor's mine! He never had anything to do with death!' He screamed inside his own head, but it looked like Death had a new errand to run.

"You're bleeding. Be careful, with thin blood, it would prove a feat to try and get you back again. You're only allowed so many transplants before they deny you." A rhaspy voice said, then began to hum the wedding march again. "And I don't think Deacon would like to be a bystander when I have to take you down to hell, would he? No, he's already throwing a fit. But he's Deacon, right? If he isn't screwing everything up he isn't happy. It's a surprise they haven't taken that little girl from him. Oh, but they will. Night will fall and both of you will be gone. And what then? I wonder what he's going to think of that. Sure, you'll be better off. But that doesn't mean he's going to forget you. No, everyone BUT him is going to forget you. Those words ringing in his head for all eternity. 'You're just like my father'." Death smiled over at the boy, then snatched him up by the arm, hauling him into the tree.

"Careful. The boy's hung himself many times up here." He warned.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor sobbed. This wasn't even Deacon anymore. "Y-you can't take me away," He snarled. "Y-you can't m-make them fucking f-forget.." He coughed, yowling as he was pulled into the tree further, wings catching on branches.

"I-I don't wanna leave, D..." He whimpered. "I love y-y-you..I just don't want y-you fucking hurt c-cos' me is all...p-...pl-lease..."

He stared up at the branches, images of Deacon hanging there, and gagged faintly, rubbing at his own scarred throat. Jon had slit it right open. He had died in a coma in the hispital, lasted three days in heaven before attempted rape of the high goddess, before she condemned him to hell on earth.

And it only kept getting worse. He stared down at Deacon's belt, then back up at the tree branch again, tears rolling down his cheeks. "M-my biggest fear isn't of dying a-anymore, but n-not having something to live f-for in the first place, being forg-gotten. E-everyone I've m-met deserves that m-memory.." His voice was hushed. He played with the belt, pressing Deacon's shirt to the gash up his side gently. Deacon, it was fucking Deacon's body, he kept telling that to himself.

His voice was only for the two--three?--of them now as fingers tracing over the object in his hand. "Y-you can't take me way f-from him lile that, from a-any of them. Nobody's g-gonna be hurt cos me nomore..."

He stood carefully, finding a notch in the branch that the belt end fit into, testing it with a curious hand. "I love y-you Deacon..." He rasped, and leaned forward, a bit, a hand bracing his wieght as he made to widen tje belt loop, eyes closing, swallowing the knot in his throat.

[deacon reid rudman]

Death sat silent, listening to him talk with a smirk. But as he watched him loop the belt around the tree, and Deacon screamed even louder, so loud that if Death were to open it's mouth, you could probably hear him.

"Go on, hang you-" The rhaspy voice started, then his eyes turned back to his vibrant green color.

"Connor! No!" Deacon cried, grabbing the boy around the waist. He slipped the belt off, tossing it to the far end of the yard. He pulled Connor to him, holding him tight in his lap. "I love you, Connor.. You never hurt me, Connor.. Never.. The idea of you hurting is what kills me, what makes me so angry. I don't want you to hurt, especially if I can't do anything about it. I love you.." He held him close, stroking his hair gently. He couldn't help but think of what would have gone through Christy's mind, seeing her brother hanging from the tree. Bandit's room did overlook the back yard, after all.

"You never hurt me.." He whispered, kissing him deeply. He ran his fingers across his cheek, so afraid to let go.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor sobbed softly, shaking so bad he felt like a fucking vibrator. He curled up against Deacon, clinging to him desperately. "Y-you can't leave m-me," He sobbed, throwing his arms around his neck. He kissed him, but was too shaken to do much more, touched at Deacon's face, as if afraid he would vanish again in an instant. "I'm s-so scared Deacon..." He whimpered. "I-...y-you're not like my f-father...you aren't...please don't f-fucking ever think that...the s-sex....I wanted that from y-you...you gave m-me that choice. A-and on the bridge it wasn't y-you fault, mine, you h-had no control...."

He coughed, stress taking a toll on him. "I can't-...." His shoulders shook with harder cries as he buried his face, too paralyzed with fear, shock, grief, to even move. He didn't know what to do about any of this anymore. It was too much to take. He was past the point of cracking anymore, weak and startled, half beaten and in withdrawal. "I'd rather due right n-now then y-y-you take m-me any other fuckin' way...lemme s-suffer this damn sickness Deacon....j-just so I can be with you...don't h-hurt yourself over it...m-my dad ended my l-life once Deac-con...pl-lease..." He sniffed, breathless, past trying to control his sobs and tears, clinging onto Deacon for dear life, begging him, trying to get him to see that this was all he wanted.

[deacon reid rudman]

It killed Deacon to see him cry, and he held him as close as he could, rocking him gently, as far as he could without falling off the branch. He kissed the top of his head, rubbing his side. "Shh.. Everything's okay now, Connor.. Nothing's ever going to make me leave you.. Nothing's going to take you away from me.. I love you, okay? I love you more than anything." He kissed his forehead, then laid his head on top of Connors, trying to comfort him, or at least get him to stop shaking.

He was past just bleeding. He was gushing blood, his heart pounding to try and keep up. He felt it trickling down his leg, dripping off his toes. He glanced down and realized he had a puddle there. But he wouldn't say anything about it, didn't need Connor scared.

"Just close your eyes and listen to the wind, okay?" He said quietly, fingers running through Connor's hair. He tipped his chin back, kissing him softly. "Just listen to the wind. Everything is going to be okay." He wrapped his arms tightly around him, looking down at him. 'Just don't go to sleep. Because if I die, you're going to break your neck falling.' He thought, rubbing Connor's stomach gently.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor didn't calm though, no matter how he wished to, refused to close his eyes. "Y-you're lying..." He rasped, staring at him with hurt. In explanation he brought a hand to Deacon's side and brought it back, staring at the blood dripping from his fingers with a sickened expression. "N-no Deacon..." He mumbled under his breath. But stress, lack of breath and stability, had him feeling light headed. Too much pressure on his already stressed body.

The little girls were inside, Deacon was bleeding out, he had almost hung himself, and Jon was still probably lurking out front somewhere, waiting.

Connor drew in a faint breath, hand falling to a rest between them, smudging Deacon's blood on his own bare chest, wings growing limp, now nothing more than a dead weight. "-don't f-feel good.." He whimpered, trying to keep up with everything. He couldn't tear his eyes away from the blood, felt more tears start down his cheeks. How was he suppised to know what happened whenthe grim reaper died? Right now Deacon seemed just as human.

He didn't think he could ever cry again after this , couldn't stop his frightened tears. The belt was in the grass somewhere... But he swore, if Deacon died, he would find a way to make sure the girls were safe. And then he would end it all. The pain and grief, abuse. The memories, guilt. He would never see Christy again, Adam or his mom. If anything it would be Jon he would meet in hell....his worst nightmare, one he could not escape. But at that point, he would not want to.

[deacon reid rudman]

Deacon sighed, holding him close. He didn't want Connor to see and freak out. "I'm not leaving you. I promise." He held him close, rubbing his side gently. He hoped it was a promise he wouldn't break. He knew if he died, he would just come back once his body had healed. Which was probably a few hours. But Connor could die in those few hours, and if he woke up to a dead Connor, the first thing he was going to do was strangle his father, torture him until he was forced to bring his soul to hell, where he was positive the man was going. He just hoped it was in a different circle than Connor. Another wave of helplessness washed over him, knowing once Connor was gone, he couldn't keep him from his dad.

"I love you. And I'm never going to leave you. No matter what. You're mine." He rubbed his stomach gently, slowly propping his leg up He knew no pressure was going to be enough pressure, and Connor was nothing but dead weight right about now, so he cradled him in his arm, the boy leaning against his aching hip. The blood started to slow, and he took in a deep breath, leaning his head against the tree.

"You have a long life to live. You have to watch Bandit and Chris grow up, watch them get married. I bet Bandit isn't even going to want me to walk her down the aisle. She's gonna choose you over me, what with that secret affair and everything you two have." He kissed his forehead. "And who knows, if getting married is what you want, we could have two adorable flower girls." He could imagine Bandit with a basket of flowers, throwing them at people. He chuckled at the thought, shaking his head.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor listened to him, smiling at the idea. He had closed his eyes, hand absently pressed to Deacon's side. But of course his efforts didn't matter. If nobody was here, Connor would end it all.

The girls would lose both of them in that single moment. "I-...I would m-mary y-you any day..."

He coughed softly, breaths quick and faint.

[deacon reid rudman]

Deacon smiled, stroking his cheek gently. He didn't know exactlyy how serious Connor was about the words he had just said, so Deacon just leaned down, kissing his forehead. He wrapped his arms around him again, holding him close. He closed his eyes, taking in a deep breath before falling completely silent. He listened to the wind whistle through the trees, Connor's faint breathing before glancing over at his hip. It looked like someone had been murdered in the yard. He took Connor's hand into his, lacing their fingers together.

"It's okay if I just, keep you forever?" He asked with a smile, squeezing his hand gently. He moved his foot around in circles, trying to keep the blood flowing in it.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor swallowed. "Yes..." He rasped. And new tears broke free. "I-I didn't mean to upset y-you in there Deacon...I was 'f-fraid of letting y-you see how much it hurt knowing y-y-you did that...I-I-...I shoulda stayed with you..you wouldn't of c-come out here.."

He swallowed, hugging him close, eyes turning to the blood ground below ajd his jaw trembled. It looked like his first suicide attempt in the bathroom at home, Adam busting down the door to get to him.

"I'm sorry..." He whimpered softly, kissing the corner of Deacon's mouth. He gazed down at the scabs on his wrists quietly, curiously a moment, Bee's words lingering in his head. But he realized in ways they had already talked about it. And i had onky created a bigger mess.